Sweet Mother of Mercy

New Song Title: Anything Less Than 'Fucking Brilliant' is an Insult

Do you know how many goddamn books I've read?
[chorus]
I'm an English major, son.
Maybe you should shut your trap while I
[wailing]
let the juices flow.
[/chorus]
I've got a blazer with patches on it.
Been close to Massachussetts
Know how to pronounce Nietszche
Talk with an accent I learned from Inside the Actor's Studio
I think they were interviewing an Australian
Mel Gibson.
[chorus]
I feel infinite!
I'm fucking brilliant!
I'm am~azing!
[chorus]
My sperm flies sideways
Impregnate bitches what don't even live in the same dorm room.
(while I masturbate to Joyce, O'Brian, and Flynn)
Kids pop out wit' Phd's and shit
Cuz they're smart.
Cuz my sperm is smart
[chorus]
I'm on a first name basis with all my teachers
Make fun of freshmen behind their backs
Fuck alumni for grant money
You know, the usual brilliant shit.
[chorus]

Next Song Title: There's Lots of Ways to Write a Song (Your Mother is a Whore)